It snowed today.
Sitting snuggled up with small ones at my aunt’s house on my weekly childcare stint, I wonder if I’ll remember this.
It’s been so easy to see things, acknowledge them (barely), move on. File it, forget it, hardly even notice it. Next thing, next thing, next thing. Focus, Anna, focus.
What’s next. Where to. Which paper. Did I lose a paper? Naptime – head hurts – Just half an hour till nap time! Or maybe, I have half an hour – naptime!?!
Life is busy. My brain is full. (Or empty, I’m not sure.) It’s been six weeks of information overload, preparing for a lifetime of such. Oh boy. The education program keeps you busy.
So the snow – it was nice.
I’ll admit my insides cringed and my outsides wailed at the wet, wet snow and the blinding white blanket when I emerged from the basement suite today.
It was icky.
Really, really, wet and icky. The kind of slush-and-ice snow that’s great for snowmen and soaking your mitts faster than it takes to scrape your windshield and turns the streets into slick, packed, and potholed luge runs and curling lanes.
Not that I had any mittens on to soak this morning. It’s October, for goodness’ sake. We all hope for no snow till halloween, around here. I was talking winter tires a week ago; I was so proud to be on the ball and on the preemptive side of things. But of course, the tire swap didn’t actually happen until now (I DID TRY, though! I TRIED!) so along with the rest of the city I hit the streets in a summer tire, skating-like fashion. Let the record show that “Mud and Snow” are actually terrible with Ice and Slush. Awful.
But I made it.
I made it to my destination and did the kid trade off and made the tea. Changed a diaper, and spent some time with Paw Patrol, and watched out the windows at the snow.
It was bigger snow, at my aunt’s place.
I can appreciate that kind of snow a little easier.
(and Yes, there are different kinds of snow.
If you don’t know that, you aren’t Canadian 😉 )
I made muffins. The house smelled good.
The 2 year old ate a muffin; quite independently.
More miraculously – he ate it Quietly.
Boy 2 had a snuggle day.
I had tea.
And a kid on my lap, and a soft, soft dog that came to snuggle too.
So relaxed, she was.
So gentle, he was.
And I wondered
Will I remember?
Will I even remember this?
What WILL I see when I look back on this fall?
The new haircut? Or the new computer?
My new jacket?
The funny feeling of constant in-check,
the no-in between?
What will I remember?
I hope it is more than a jacket.
I hope it is more than rush.
More than classrooms.
More than snow-hate.
I used to love the snow. (Like, even last week I was excited for it.)
Maybe that’s where I should start my remembering.
The world is more than my classroom.
This time is more than the hurdles.
Enjoy it. See the snow.
Smell it and taste it and wipe it off your windshield and go buy yourself some mittens, Anna.
And maybe keep taking pictures because really, I’m not convinced you’ll remember any of this by the time you make it through.
Phew. Hang in there, self. Enjoy the snow!